chapter 11: bathing and why i think it is important

soap is underrated. i like the way it makes my skin feel: slippery and smooth (and wet — nope, that's just water).

my soap is why my bathroom gets a visitor occasionally. sometimes, it's the reason i get out of my bed.

after a productive morning and an even longer day of work, white lather is the baby that water and soap make on my skin. it's a baby i did not ask for, but the baby i am definitely going to get. (normally, i am against babies but i am okay with this one.)

bathing is the only chance my thoughts have at running wild:

1. making my friends go through hoops and crash-land on a cryopreserved trampoline,
2. organising the summer olympics for mongeese,
3. visualising where i’m going to find my next $5,
4. finding answers to questions that really speak to me,
5. remembering things i said in 2017 and deciding my life is over.

also, showers are loud. like, aggressively loud. the water hits the floor like it has a personal vendetta. sometimes it drowns even my thoughts, which is great, because some of those thoughts shouldn’t be heard by anyone. including me.

this is why bathing is important. life is about being clean. bathing teaches life lessons.

people say “don’t think too much.”
these people have clearly never been in a shower. bathing is basically thinking, but wetter.

in conclusion:

1. bathing is an underrated activity that takes the dirt off (but only if you let your soap do it).
2. my soap and i have a connection. it’s the only one who gets me.
3. shower thoughts are free. take them.

stay clean. opportunities are slippery.